Wolman 510
These are quotes from my freshmen year (2001-2002) at The Johns Hopkins University living in Wolman Hall 510.
Parag Goyal aka Payrog aka Rag aka Ragu aka Gu/Goo aka Guru/Gooroo aka Goofy aka Perogie aka Gufatch aka Pagar aka Pagu aka Pinkey
Jake Kail aka Jake Bébé aka Snake aka The Snake Beeb
Jon Zimmer aka JayZee aka Zimm Zimma aka Skimm Skimma aka Slim Zimma aka Zimbabwe
Carlos Macasaet aka Los aka Los Lobos aka Lobes aka Bos aka LosBos aka The Brain
Guest Starring:
Kyla aka Mrs. Payrog aka Mrs. Ragu aka Mrs. Guru
Joseph Mazzarini aka Joey Maz
Edward McQueen aka Eddy Mac aka Steam Jeans McQueen
“I can’t picture myself being anything.”
-The Snake Beeb
Snake: How qualified do you have to be?
Guru: You don’t have to be… you could do it.
Matty T: Just compare the book to the movie.
Snake: The problem is I didn’t watch the movie or read the book.”
Kyla: You’re in everything!!
Jake: Dude, I eat this kid’s…house!
Parag: “You don’t know what you’re capable of?”
Jake: “In terms of what?”
Parag: “In terms of achieving your goals”
Jake: “Well I don’t set goals.”
Skimm: I’ve definitely lost a couple of points of my IQ from staying in this room.
The Snake Beeb: Yea, but you’ve gained…(*motions with hands)…(*stares blankly)…I dunno, but you’ve gained.
“God…it must SUCK to become a prostitute.”
-The GOOROO
“Alls I remember from that movie is some guy lookin for his marbles the whole time.”
-Jake the Snake
Snake: I can’t imagine being with another roomate.
Zimm: I think I’d pretty much get along with anyone.
Snake: I think I’d get along with them, I just don’t know if they’d get along with me.
“I hope I don’t spill any of this hot water on my hands”
-The Beeb as he spills hot water on his hands
“I’d have a permanent good smell, if Zim farts, still smells good to me.”
-Snake
Zimm picks up a roll of toilet paper. “Yo, who left this in here?”
Snake replies, “Parag brought that in here.”
With that, Zimbabwe tosses the paper into the hallway with no regard for anything and Beeb says “You’re learning man, you’re learning.”
*Zimm is eating Parag’s leftover food*
Zimm: I just hope this wasn’t one of Guru’s friends’.
Beeb: I hope it was.
Lobe: Well, what’s Parag’s friends’ is Parag’s and what is Parag’s is yours.
To a drunk Ghetto-P trying to act sober: “Yeah, I think you’re just nuts in general”
-Los Lobos
“The little ones are…. smaller.”
-Zimbabwe
“What do you think would happen if somebody shot coffee into their arm?”
*long moment of silence*
“I’ll take your no response to mean ’shut up you asinine idiot.’”
-Snake
Zimm: What is the capital of Canada?
Beeb: Providence?
*informed he is ridiculously wrong
Beeb: Wait, what is Providence??
(correct response: Ottawa)
Beeb (hours later): Providence, Canada…it just sounds right.
Zimm: You goin to CCP?*
Snake: eh… I don’t see why I would…
*CCP - Johns Hopkins course 100.108 - Class Culture and Power
“Do we live here?”
-Gufatch - coming home to a surprisingly clean suite
“It can’t be too clean… you know?”
-The Beeb on cleaning their room
“Right now… At this very moment… Our room, is cleaner than your room… I don’t know how long it’s gonna stay that way, but right now… our room, is cleaner than your room.”
-Zimm
“A can of milk? What the hell is a can of milk? Milk doesn’t come in cans!”
-The BeeBee
“One day Pagar… You will die in your sleep. Might be tonight… Might be ten years from now.”
-Zimm Zimma
I’ll be the first to admit, I’m a goofy bastid.
-Snake
Gottfried Dietze better sleep with one eye open…. that rat bastard.
-Beeb
